Smoked Gouda and Bacon Pimento Cheese

Once, during a particularly heated legislative battle, we decided to order lunch from the No Name Deli in Columbia. Yes, that’s actually the place’s name—No Name. Our assistant jotted down our orders as we called them out. My turn came fairly early in the process, and I asked for “a pimento cheese sandwich, toasted, please.” After she’d taken down all the orders, I glanced at her list and didn’t see my pimento cheese sandwich listed. I inquired just to make sure it was on the list, and she