Sometimes a Cigar

—GEORGE BURNS, IN A NEWSPAPER INTERVIEW, 1989

Cigars are Like Motorcycles. Both Can be objects of great sophistication, carefully crafted and capable of giving real pleasure to those who know how to handle them. And both can, in the hands of the parvenu, the showoff, the schmuck, become loud agents of contempt for one’s surroundings and the people who inhabit them. The unmuffled Harley roaring down a quiet street at midnight and the cheap smoldering panatella waved arrogantly about in a crowded room both deliver the same message: I do what I want. I don’t care what anyone thinks. Fuck you.