The Farewell Breakfast

Appears in
Floyd's American Pie
Floyd's American Pie

By Keith Floyd

Published 1989

  • About
Good morning, sir, and what can I get you this morning? It’s your last morning isn’t it?’
‘Yes it is. And since it is, I’d like some cereal…’
‘Wheat puffs, bran chips, flaked wheat with raisins, golden nuggets, honey-coated corn puffs …?’
‘Just some cornflakes, please! And one egg over hard, a side of bacon. And some ketchup …’
‘Yes, sir. Have a nice day …’

‘You know, Floyd, basically human beings are weak,’ says J. J. ‘They don’t have a clue, they just wander around. So if you can just blast right through, like we’ve done, and have fun while you’re doing it, it’s like, it’s just like … well … do I have to finish? Could you finish it?’