Blackberries

After scratching and bloodying throughout the year, the bramble offers up its autumn truce with its juicy blackberries. Like a kingfisher on minnows, one must strike fast and snare the treats before the harvesting force of old ladies robs the hedgerows blind. (An open receptacle is best when picking, as a bag will result in an inadvertent smoothie.)

Foxes love blackberries too and, either in juicy ecstasy or simply marking their territory, will wee on the bushes. The same goes for dogs. So pluck the higher fruit. I’d steer clear of even the juiciest blackberries from busy roads unless you like to scrape monoxide conserve across your toast in the morning.